GQ

We all know that when life hands you lemons make lemonade, but what happens when life throws and huge juicy lemon at you and you have no hands to catch it. There is nothing to brace your fall but someone to catch you, and sweep you so far off your feet just as you try to crawl through their legs.  I’m so high and I look down to laugh and get thrown right back into what is this charismatic reality that always comes at just the nick of time.  When all you need is stability and the whole world has this emanating beauty that you can’t even touch because you can’t see straight.  The only thing you see clearly is also that lemon that’s so sour you can taste it through the phone feel the slight holes in the zest from 2748 miles away.  Remembering every simple detail on how hands moved out the window to shoo the bus, for he wasn’t going fast enough.  The sensitivity with every word thought and lingering moment stayed in the air as if a bug going for a light.  When everything feels so horribly perfect with all clarity and kindness aside I know karma may be a bitch but she can also be the biggest saint to roam the skies above.  When I felt that sand so gritty and lifeless as I was coming out of the water sunken with coral covered rock just prior to floating above those stones with so much life I could focus on just one thing. being.  I wanted nothing more than to be in that moment and feel everything I could each word, turn of the page accent of every word out of lips watching a movie in my head of exactly what was going on around me no imagination necessary just that moment of being.  All that was going on around had stopped just for this temporary lapse in a moment that could have easily gone unnoticed by everyone around.  Hearing the sounds of kings of leon coming from the kids to the right.  The wind blowing not once but twice the belongings to the left a pinkish purple ring.  Yet all that was noticeable was the fact that the reading had come onto the other, everything was different from one second to the next every sound, touch, feeling, sight, taste of the moment existed just then.  All for the phone to ring and the waiting began continuing to be nothing but supportive and my feeling of numb still remained and the feeling of pain for the numbness intruding on how I was really feeling set in deep I wanted to act as I wished but could not.  Only the vague longing for what I wanted to express was protruding in my skull I wanted to change everything but nothing all at once everything happens for the best of reasons.  I am going to make the sweetest and most sour lemonade ever from this!